During a practical exercise at a military police base, the instructor was giving
the class instructions in unarmed self-defense.
After he presented a number of different situations in which they might find
themselves, he asked a student, "What steps would you take if someone were
coming at you with a
large, sharp knife?"
The student replied, "Big, Fast Ones!"
On the first day of college, the Dean addressed the students, pointing out some
of the rules.
"The female dormitory will be out-of-bounds for all male students, and the male
dormitory to the female students. Anybody caught breaking this rule will be
fined $20 the first
He continued, "Anybody caught breaking this rule the second time will be fined
And concluded with this stern admonition, "Being caught a third time will cost
you a fine of $180. Are there any questions?"
A male voice from within the crowd in the auditorium was heard asking, "How much
for a season pass?!"