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Diet Excuses -

Category: Other Jokes>>

Diet Excuses

-> It is the middle of the night (it's not today and it's not tomorrow)

-> We are happy or stressed (corollary: Holidays of any kind)

-> We are outside (especially when we are camping)

-> It was on the plate of someone else (especially if it the plate of one of your children)

-> It is consumed with diet pop

-> We have actually broken a sweat (exercised) in the last 24 hours

-> Our mother or grandmother made the food

-> Our mother or grandmother has recently stressed us out and we made the food

-> We are in the car and in a hurry

-> It is some form of a salad

-> We have recently had problems with members of the opposite sex

-> We haven't had problems or any attention from members of the opposite sex in a long time

-> It includes whole grains (or is brownish at least)

-> It is in liquid form of any kind (anything that can get through a straw is calorie free)

-> It doesn't taste very good

-> You are in front of a TV or computer

-> You are standing up (in front of the refrigerator)

-> You are depressed

-> It's a free sample at a store

-> It's small and cute like an hors d'oeuvres at a cocktail party

-> It is really fancy and well made and not something you get every day

-> When wearing sweats or other expandable clothing

-> When it benefits girl scouts or any other non profit

-> When someone else is paying

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Kids Jokes , Blonde Jokes , Women jokes, yo mama jokes

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